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October 10 Nonsense talking.. I just keep thinking What did I really do on this 2 years at The One Academy nothing? I don't know Did I made parents proud? No. Sigh What am I doing now? I can't make sure Why am I such a procrastinator? I don't even feel like want to continue my assignment at all Okay Shut up. *zipping my mouth* *opens again* I hope someone return my wallet!!!! *close it again* August 31 人生人生 没有你想象中的容易 却没有你想像的难 它 可以很甜蜜 它 也可以很恐怖 就看你怎样去享受 怎样去体验 *********************************************************** 说实话 我对我的人生不是很清楚 感觉上 我就这样迷迷糊糊的过日子 就那么迷糊的 那么容易的 爱上一个人 我知道这并不可能的 但却不由自主地爱上了 我不希望自己就这样放弃他 也不想放弃我自己已经答应过的 感觉上我好像变了好多 两年前和现在来相比 我不再是两年前的我 我不敢肯定我是否成熟 不过我没有像以前那么单纯 以前的我是那么热爱着我的课程 我也不知道何时开始 开始逃避 啊~ 希望时间就这样停着 我不必去想下一步是什么 也不必回忆我以前所做过的事 我累了 很难受 我不想负担一切 难道 死是唯一的解脱 还是一生的逃避 自私的想法 我清楚的很 不过我还是不忍心 看到别人因为自己而被伤害 很矛盾的想法 对吧? Forgive me. I ain't God So I can't control my emotion I'm just a normal human I can love whoever I want It is free to love someone No matter how deep I can It just that.. This is probably just a one sided love and it will end up darkness I ain't perfectionist So I will make a lot of mistakes, even though I scare to make mistakes even though I know that is wrong, but I still make that mistakes because I know, Making mistakes is part of learning It just that.. people doesn't like that because people are scare to make mistakes too I ain't one of the superb person in the world So I can do whatever I want So please, don't stop me to love someone don't stop me to make mistakes don't stop me what I want to do don't criticize me when you don't know me well You know that I won't stop if you are stopping me You know that I stubborn as well Sometimes I just can't express it I glad that I have you but everything seems doesn't go right I am too weak to have you I have to say, I'm too lucky until I got my eyes blind to have you at my side and I afraid that you'll gone forever too once you confess to the girl you love I might lost you forever. I pray on God. Hope things will change better. Yea, I hopes that. September 30 new blogspace had been confirmed. =PHEY, im back for this moment, well i had change my blog place, from here to blogspot. so, here is my new blog link http://hermoine-lvoelses.blogspot.com/ anyway, u guys whoever are free are welcome to go to my blog! =D July 08 see for urself.. i felt myself dumped by anyone~ really, i can feel that... even my luck also didnt get along with me T^T car accident last saturday, at sunway bridge... when d time happened, i was juz act like an idiot doing nothing, cuz im actually shocked, i didnt realise all this will HAPPEN to me.. bad luck lor... haiz I really cham T.T 4 CARS KENA BANG AT THE SAME TIME U KNOW???!!!! 1st is civic, 2nd is me (become sandwich pula), 3rd is myvi, 4th is the sentra WAT THE STUPID SENTRA OWNER, he didnt realise tat the front car ADY suddenly STOPPED n den he juz CRASH myvi, n den d force coming towards me, so d civic also kena d force = kemek. my car after d accident consider quite lucky ady, my car's bonet kemek and my boot was all scratched~ but very ugly to see lar, but myvi even worse -.- d bumper almost dropped n d bonet also crashed, and d sentra, worst of all cant move cuz d paip ady blast~ haiz, watever, i juz make my police report yesterday.... hope all going well and i can CLAIM BACK for what i had lost.. June 07 Close to YouClose to You
Why do birds suddenly appear,
every time you are near? Just like me,they long to be close to you. Why do stars fall down from the sky,every time you walk by? Just like me,they long to be close to you. On the day that you were born, the angels got together and decided to create a dream come true. So, they sprinkled moon dust in your hair, with gold and starlight in your eyes of blue. That is why all the girls in town follow you all around; Just like me, they long to be close to you. i found this song quite long ady, n i finally found it! lOL~ classic songs ^^
remind me of sumone. XD think for new blog? ^^i wonder y i reli lazy to write blog these few months, even in holiday =.=
haizzzzz~ but nevermind la, at least i wrote today. ^^
anywayz i think i need to change my blog place ady or wat... blogger.com? wretch.cc? arghz... i still thinkin bout tat = =
so, any suggestion for me for any blogging space?
*Ps* I FINALLY CAN USE REAL LIVE MESSENGER ADY. WAHAHAHA~ muz say thx to rabid wor, if not say tis say tat pula. Blek. XD* March 19 today~ preseantation dayYAY....FINAlly WE FInish Our Batik presentation ady....n we finish at bout 3 sumthing....n....we go downstairs to hav a roticanai at mamak shop n add on..i call a cup of milo ice....LOL
n den we done a craziest event....go to sunway there da gei~` hehe...xiu n yar still can accept lar...cuz they wear not so formal...but me...=.= too formal LOL...
watever....we juz fly there straight after we finish our meal, n we play dunno wat game is tat...but main thing is da game hav 3 colours...red green and blue...haha...yar recommend tat game 2 me n xiu...i thought tat game is not so funny ba? but end up...we play tat like hell...LOL...TAT game reli make me very nervous bout tat result lorrr...but den yar more geng den me...and she played da most...hahaha
yaya...n den they play da second game...also dunno wat name is tat...but xiu n yar...play more crazy den 1st time lol...hehe...i also take pic from dem...dunno they noe o not...Bwahahha
n....after tat we go play racing cars...WT....at 1st xiu win me n yar....darn it...LOL n after tat i win her back 1 time..but da last round...=.= my own mistake...make her easily go to winner state....but after tat..haha she also lose ady..n wego for gun shooting also...n finally...HOUSE OF DEAD 4 lollllllllll...i love tat very MUCH... but not yet get through 1st stage den die d...fell shame for myself...lol
aiks....finally batik project IS FINISH ...TAT is wat i more concern bout....anyway thx for xiu for not blamin me tat i didnt bring da sketches...im very frogetful sumtimes...n so long wat did i do so far~ anything wrong... please forgive me ooo...^^ March 18 final projects~ wish me luck tomoro ^^finally...1st project had been pass up...da figure perspective...today is also d last day for life drawing, *PHEW*~ actually tat 1 not my best....im been lazying from few weeks ago.. feel suck on myself...=.=...n now i hav 2 prepare myself for tomoro presentation...batik presentation...need 2 wear formal sumore -.-lll...o ya, tomoro is nic's birthday...so ngam at my presentation day LOL...so i will SPEciallY RememBER his BDAy 1 d...hehehe...hm...wanna buy him a present o not? n i will goin to his coll at thursday with my fren...cuz my fren wanna go for a register...aiyaa...no need de la..he wont mind d....also can save up money for myself...LOL~
3rd assignment...is CULTURE... at 1st i come here for research, but den now bloggin...=.=...forget bout it...i also thought tat ady... sumore now rainin at sunway...whoa...a huge rain juz now...huge lightning and LOud GRooming sound outside...luckily i didnt attach any wire at my laptop, if not my laptop will hav a same destiny with my fren's mac...suddenly get shot...n d 4th...BUNGALOW....im not yet done arr....ARGHHHH....n d dateline is nx friday...*sob* who can help me???
anyway...wish me luck at presentation...didnt get anything wrong tomoro, and can talk fluently tomoro....^^ February 20 memories...when de time i in secondary...
i felt tat i am very happy after i met them...felt tat i will die for dem also...
bt when i go out of my dear secondary scool..
when d time b4 i go the one academy...i regret tat i come out from secondary so early n i never can go back there anymore...
bt after d time i had go in the one, wat i thought b4 is not so bad as now...
i quite happy with here...frens...place...
yea...i still missing dem now...but not as hard as d time we left each other...
Now...
when i went through my sec scool...those memories always flow into my mind...happy memories...sad things...
i also didnt noe tat toa also had to repeat tis feeling again...another separating...
but this time...we still can meet each other...at least on tat ^^ weird me~dunno y...rite all these dumb things..
a weird me~~
juz today i realise...i am so lonely these years...
although i hav a lots of frens...most of d frens are satisfied with my attitue...
but when d time wanna go home...when d time juz at here alone...all those things seems like stopped suddenly...
and if u didnt waiting for tomoro...u wont noe d tomoro's news...
suddenly felt our life was juz a small influence enough...eventhough some of dem done a great job in their whole life..
we...juz a small bit of sand in a universe
.....arghhh =.=lll.....wat am i thinkin about???
i reli say a lot weird things today...
sorry to myself...>.< February 07 我也不知道该写什么...不知为什么,最近我的心情总是很低落,我也不知道为什么会这样,虽然现在是新年,更何况是初一尾声,也不知道在烦什么。功课是其中一个烦恼,不过其他的烦恼,也不知道为什么而烦。不知道,就是不知道,这也是第一次我写华语字在这里。有史以来的一次,也可能会继续写吧?最近我也写了几面的小说,是几个月前没写完的小说。我看,我还是继续写呢还是在等多一会儿??? January 25 time after time~another week is finish....i suddenly felt tat time were going very very fast!!!juz only last week...i had my piano lesson on friday...
my teacher's father so happy 2 see me cuz he quite long time didnt see me although i still continue my lessons...n tis week...after he saw me...
he suddenly ask"eh? u come for u extra class or is ur own lesson?hahaha...it seems like yesterday u juz come" i also quite agree with tat...
and after tat i had my piano practical lesson...awww...my 1st pieces...erm..not so hard lar...but at 1st time always is d hardest...and just d notes make me a bit blur...maybe i too long didnt touch piano for months...but i will try my best i can...in order to get my best cert in GRADE 8!!!
awww...about d culture...didnt i said about last week tutorial?yea..it is funny on last tutorial...but for tis week...i just felt like i am a fish without water...vanee is kinda strict yesterday...she wan all of us TALK...n d topic is 'wat is race? how u define race? how u noe u r chinese/malay/india'??
i didnt post my own question tis time...and i think it is out of question..so i just support somebodies opinion or juz add in some...if not i dunno how vanee will say about tat...
anyway...least n important...I WAN TO GET MY G8 CERT!!! January 20 SHOUT OUT LOUD!!!i done my major foundation for bout 2 weeks...nth special...but hav 4 subs only...
life drawing, culture n society studies, perspective, n visual comm
so far now, wat i quite interestin is culture studies...quite surprise izzit?
i also feel surprise for myself...mayb d perbahasan on last thursday ba...
d lec give us a title 'what u hate most in malaysia?'
d whole hour...they talk those complains...after 5 - 10 minutes d session will close...and very cool when d time to open another conversation, n i start my 1 ...is about d bumiputra n non bumiputra rights...
n we quite attract with tat...more n more ppl go into my conversation...n for sure...my conversation is d longest...n at 4pm, lec had stop all tat...and 1 of d student suddenly says tat all our conversation is too plain..nothing special.....SUCK...i noe tat is plain a...but it is also a quite interesting ma...if not how they all participate in leh???
anyway...from tis i had learn a little brave to shout out...at least i said my opinion out... January 10 2007 ~~ 20082007,i gone through f6 life for few months...and i dun even think TOA at once...meanwhile f6 have to get d best result to get in U, otherwise... u will have no chance to get d U u desired...n i am not d 1...so i had left d future head prefect place to my frens...n i reject being an eldest pupil in scool...
so i decide where else i can go... n my mom suddenly talk about TOA, since i like to draw very much...n she reli let me get in here...n on 3rd orientation day i had met evon...awww...like her so much...at 1st i thought i will just hav evon only...cuz i am not a reli 'zhu dong' person n i tried my best to do it...n now 2008...we had 2 separate each other...cannot see each other everyday...i juz afraid tat we will become far away since we cannot see each other..n we will talk lesser n lesser...juz afraid of tat very much... BUT...... U ALL MUZ REMEMBER ME OOOO....ALTHOUGH I AM NOT EVERYDAY TALK 2 U...LAUGH WITH U..... OR EVEN EAT WITH U...+ DUN WORRY n BEE HAPPYYY!! December 23 CD075-6s...i dunno how 2 say... the holiday had been gone through already 1 week... but i still miss them very much... i gonna crazy i feel all white in my mind just only hav u all i reli dunno how 2 say maybe u will thought tat i reli hav 2 be sent into tanjung rambutan or mayb u will thought tat i no need to think all this frens... cuz u all leaving me far n far n far away from me... n i dunno whether hav chance to see u all o not or hav a chance to talk to u i reli scared about tat in my whole life... wat i scared most is lonely i just afraid afraid tat phenomena will happen on me evon, sinyee, eezee, yuenmun, tofu, nicole, patrick, jengchyuan, zermi, kam, jason, saukeong, yeo, zhenyi, jun, jamie, travin, cherly, calvin, jeremy, daniel, iz, weiyin, suling, nick, kevin, patrick chong, lilian...(other else i forgot those names...sorry if i didnt mention out...) MISS U ALL... CRAZY ABOUT U ALL... hope u all reli hav a nice holiday+merry christmas+happy new year+happy birthday 2 jeng chyuan..haha...at least i noe he is a christmas boy... October 14 waiting to that day ^^Free
The dream within The voice is calling A song A prayer From deep inside you To guide you Be The dream within The light is shining A flame on the wind Salvation begins Look beyond Where hearts can see Dream in peace Trust Love Believe We tremble and spin Suspended within *part of the lyrics from final fantasy*
i saw final fantasy-- the spirite within in vcd
wow... on tat time i feel tat movie is very nice...
the ppl... the explosion...
all seems very real....
maybe i will do that great animation sumday???
haha...
i will try my best to do it...
really~~^^
September 18 2nd sem 2nd week tuesdaythe second term is on already...
but the main reason is..... I STILL FEEL LAZY TO DO THOSE ASSIGNMENT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
at 1st...i thought tat i will more concentrate in this sem.... but...haiz....i think it will be another messy sem lo...
i done my 6 sketches... er...actually i done 3 only...other than i just simply do at class...and suppose hav to do 8 d...
and i scared tat the teacher might angry with me...cuz i didnt finish her work...but after she sees my work...haha... she said tat is interesting on my sketch....hehe...i feel a little proud of my sketches...but after i saw kam n jason 1....my proudness straightly goes dow...cuz...their 1 is nicer than me 100 times leh!!!
haiz...but at least lecturer feel some interesting in my sketches...n tat is enough den others... animation... i am going to hav a animation diploma SOOON!!!
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after 2 and a half years la~~ May 19 COLLEGE!!! I AM COMING!!!after i go the orientation for THE ONE academy for 3 days....
suddenly i feel so Lonely...
nobody talk to me
just feel like fell down from a very very high mountain...
it is no longer easy as i open my mouth in school
i am afraid
i afraid tat i won't making any friends in tat college...
and i dunno how to TALK to them...
it been such a long time didn't open this space...
at 1st i feel juz wanna throw it...
but i couldn't
i noe
not every people will see my blog...
i jus wanna say something to myself
i jus wanna say some secret to myself
so
if somebody sees this
pls dun broke out this secret ok?
actually
i really want a friend in the college
tat's all
but those damn ppl is very 'proud' of themself
self-praise in other word
and also...
some of their hair...
SUCKS!!!
and...
on tat 3 days...
i had a serious headache
wo...very very pain o...
and the orientation is damn long...
and i had to tahan pissing for whole day long
although i noe i can go out for toilet
yaya...
i must do my best at the college
this is my own chance
i wanna be the 'best of the best' in the college
haha...
wish myself luck will always flow to me..
and...
hope my friend still remember me...
yaya, also including alex from canberra and william tat wish to take biomedical science course...
take care~~ |
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